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| Tweet Topic Started: Thu Sep 27, 2007 7:29 am (69,140 Views) | |
| AWOLangel | Wed May 27, 2009 9:28 pm Post #17701 |
 
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This Chicken Has Flown The Coop Zoo | San Francisco, CA, USA (Working at the zoo, I hear a lot of strange things from visitors…) Me: *feeds chickens* Older man: “Oh, you’re a bus stop!” Me: “Huh?” Older man: “A bus stop! You’re a bus stop, aren’t you?” Me: “?” Woman: “No, she’s not a bus stop.” Older man: “…oh.” Me: *completely at a loss* |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Wed May 27, 2009 9:29 pm Post #17702 |
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We Need One Of These In Every Store, Part 3 Retail | Ohio, USA (The store I work at has a policy where an employee has to check every customer’s receipt on their way out the exit. After checking several receipts, a customer walks up with three items in his cart and starts walking right past me.) Me: “Sir, I need to check your receipt.” Customer: “I only have three items in my cart.” Me: “I know, but it’s store policy. I just need to mark it with –” Customer: “It’s because I’m black, isn’t it?” Me: “Excuse me?” Customer: “You’re only checking my receipt because I’m black! You think because I’m black, I’m a thief!” Me: “Sir, I checked the receipts for everybody in front of you, and I’m going to check the receipts for everybody behind you. Now if you’ll let me see your receipt, I just need to mark it. You’re holding everybody up.” Customer: “No, I’m not moving until you call your manager! I don’t shop here to be treated like this! You d*** racist!” (At this point, a big, imposing customer waiting behind him–who just happens to also be African American–explodes.) Big, imposing customer: “GET YOUR A** OUT OF THE WAY NOW!” Customer: *hands me receipt* |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Wed May 27, 2009 9:30 pm Post #17703 |
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We Need One Of These In Every Store, Part 2 Convenience Store | Atlanta, GA, USA (There is a long line at a small local convenience store due to a very nice but inexperienced cashier. The cashier messes up a purchase for the second time…) Owner, to cashier: ”What the f*** is wrong with you?! You are so f***ing worthless!” Customer: “How dare you talk to her like that! She is trying her hardest!” Owner, to customer: ”If you don’t like how I treat my employees, you can leave!” (Upon hearing this, everyone in line drops their things on the ground and walks out of the store.) |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Wed May 27, 2009 9:30 pm Post #17704 |
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We Need One Of These In Every Store Hardware Store | Vancouver Island, Canada Employee: *making out a rain check* “Okay, so I’m just going to look on the computer and check if any other locations have this item.” Nice customer: “Okay, thanks.” Angry customer: “Stop f***ing socializing and do your g**d*** job!” Employee: “Sir, please don’t be abusive, I’m just checking our other loc-” Angry customer: “I don’t care! DO YOUR JOB!” (At this point, the angry customer moves toward the counter in a very threatening way. The customer behind HIM, a super-fit guy in a UFC jacket, steps in. Mr. UFC grabs the angry customer in a CHOKE HOLD and drags him outside, followed quickly by management, and to the applause of the staff and customers inside the store.) (The angry customer was banned from the store and Mr. UFC got a gift card.) |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Wed May 27, 2009 9:31 pm Post #17705 |
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At Least He’s Being Honest Bookstore | Los Angeles, CA, USA Customer: “Excuse me, where are your graphic novels?” Me: “Graphic novel section? If you’ll just follow me, I ca–” Customer: “No. Graphic novels.” Me: “Graphic novels. Right this way–” Customer: “No! Graphic novels!” Me: “Graphic novels.” Customer: “No… graphic novels!” (A moment of silence passes…) Customer: “Sorry, I’m feeling contrary.” |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Wed May 27, 2009 9:31 pm Post #17706 |
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At Least She’s Being Honest Small Men's Store | Hanover, MD, USA (A lady comes in with a bag of shirts.) Lady: “I need to return these.” Me: “Sorry we can’t take those back, they’re opened…” Lady: “Why the hell not!?” Me: “You can only return the shirts if they’re unopened. It’s the store policy.” Lady: “Bulls**t, you’re trying to rip me off! You’re suppose to take these back–they don’t fit my husband!” Me: “If you read the policy you would know you couldn’t bring them back, ma’am.” Lady: “What store policy?!” (I point to the store policy above and behind me on a red sign in big white letters. The lady snatches the bag of shirts and starts stomping off. My manager, who was watching the whole time, finally says something.) Manager: “I’m sorry ma’am, next time you should read the policy–” Lady: *cuts off my manager* “I DON’T F**KING READ!!” |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Wed May 27, 2009 9:33 pm Post #17707 |
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Ah, Fathers, Part 3 Cash Advance/Cheque Cashing Store | Calgary, Alberta, Canada (I worked at a store that cashes peoples personal cheques. A young, 17ish boy approaches me.) Me: “Hello, how can I help you?” Customer: “I need to cash this cheque, please.” *hands over information* Me: “Okay, everything looks good. Can I have the cheque, please?” Customer: “Sure.” (I scan the cheque through and an account pops up. It had been used before only two hours previous at another one of our stores not far from my location.) Me: “Just give me a moment. I need to go to the back to verify your cheque, and I’ll be back with your money.” Customer: “Okay.” (I go to the back of the store and call the number on the cheque. An older gentleman who I believe to be the customer’s father answers the phone.) Customer’s father: “Hello?” Me: “Hello, sir. I believe your son is here with a cheque that you gave him and that he is wanting it to be cashed. I just wanted to make sure this was correct as we have cashed one already today for the same amount.” Customer’s father: *calmly* “What’s your address?” Me: “It’s **** Macleod Trail SW.” Customer’s father: “I’ll be down there in a few minutes. I don’t live far… just don’t let my son leave.” (I head back to the front to talk to the young customer.) Me: “Hey, sorry this is taking so long…” Customer: *explodes* “WHATEVER! You’re taking forever! This is my dad’s g**d**n cheque and it’s good! Why are you taking so long?! He has lots of money and he gave this to me to cash so that I could have the money!” *rants* (As he is ranting, a large man about the size of Vin Diesel comes in the store. The look on his face is sheer anger. He just stands there in the lobby as his son reams me out.) Me, to customer: “Why don’t you ask your father?” Customer’s father: “YOU LITTLE B**TARD!” (I have never seen a boy try to run so fast out the door in my life. He only makes it to the parking lot outside the store before his father nabs him. Let’s just say his buttocks learned the value of a dollar.) |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| Gummy | Wed May 27, 2009 9:33 pm Post #17708 |
Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Wed May 27, 2009 9:33 pm Post #17709 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Wed May 27, 2009 9:33 pm Post #17710 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| AWOLangel | Wed May 27, 2009 9:34 pm Post #17711 |
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Someone’s Not Getting Any Tonight, Part 2 Marina | Heber Springs, AR Lady: ”Hey, we’ve heard that there might be some kind of oil something on this boat…” Me: ”Sure, let me check.” *checks* ”Come and look–your oil reservoir is almost completely empty. You should fill it immediately, and it will cost about $*.**.” Lady: ”Oh, that’s a lot. How far will that get us?” Me: ”All the way to the middle of the lake.” Lady’s husband: *laughs hysterically* |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Wed May 27, 2009 9:34 pm Post #17712 |
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Someone’s Not Getting Any Tonight Optical | Nashville, TN, USA Customer: “I like these glasses. They make me look more smarter!” Customer’s boyfriend: “Yeah, well looks can be deceiving.” |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| Gummy | Wed May 27, 2009 9:34 pm Post #17713 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| AWOLangel | Wed May 27, 2009 9:35 pm Post #17714 |
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Canada, America’s Baseball Cap Retail | Victoria, British Columbia, Canada (A young couple with an almost stereotypical southern accent enters the shop, browses around, and pick up some things, then go to the cash desk.) Me: “Is that everything for you today?” Woman: “We’re on our honeymoon…” Me: “Okay… will you be paying with cash, debit, or credit?” (The man throws some money on the counter, saying nothing.) Me: “I’m sorry, we can’t take American money.” Man:“WHY THE &@^# NOT? AMERICA IS THE GREATEST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD!” Me: “Well, that might be the case, but this isn’t America.” Woman: “What?” Me: “This isn’t America. It’s Canada.” Woman: “But that’s part of America, right?” Me: “No.” Man: “Oh, I get it. It must be Canada day. That’s when they pretend to be independent.” Me: “Sir, we ARE independent. It’s a separate country. Different money, different government, different accents.” Man: *winks to his wife* “Right…” |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| Gummy | Wed May 27, 2009 9:35 pm Post #17715 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Wed May 27, 2009 9:35 pm Post #17716 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| AWOLangel | Wed May 27, 2009 9:35 pm Post #17717 |
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Welcome To ArkMart, My Name Is Noah Zoo | Nashville, TN, USA (I work in the gift shop. Our zoo has an alligator exhibit consisting of 15 three- to four-foot long juvenile alligators.) Customer: “I was wondering if you guys sell alligators here.” Me: “Yeah, we have stuffed ones over here, and we have some PVC ones over here.” Customer: “No, like, I wanted to buy one of the alligators.” Me: “Like… out of the exhibit?” Customer: “Yeah.” Me: “Oh… well, no.” |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| Gummy | Wed May 27, 2009 9:35 pm Post #17718 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Wed May 27, 2009 9:36 pm Post #17719 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| AWOLangel | Wed May 27, 2009 9:36 pm Post #17720 |
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Let’s Try Something Simpler, Like Boiling Water Department Store | Redding, CA, USA (A woman comes into the store just before closing, and asks where our muffin pans are.) Me: “Right this way…” Customer: “So how do you make muffins?” Me: “Well… I guess you’d just have to buy a box of muffin mix and read the directions.” Customer: “Well, what do you usually put IN muffins?” Me: There’s the mix, then the eggs, then the milk, or possibly water….” Customer: “What do I do with all of that?” Me: “Normally, you would mix the ingredients and put them in the muffin pan.” Customer: “So I just pour them in the pan?” Me: “You can… but most people put the batter in paper muffin cups.” Customer: “So do I put the paper cups in before or after the batter?” Me: “…” |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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