 Wanted: New forum members! Do you have the right stuff to be an arch-angel member? Must be:
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| Tweet Topic Started: Thu Sep 27, 2007 7:29 am (69,269 Views) | |
| Gummy | Fri May 22, 2009 7:11 am Post #15121 |
Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Fri May 22, 2009 7:11 am Post #15122 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Fri May 22, 2009 7:12 am Post #15123 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Fri May 22, 2009 7:12 am Post #15124 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Fri May 22, 2009 7:13 am Post #15125 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 12:48 pm Post #15126 |
 
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from overheardeverywhere.com And Then We'll Hold This Nice Man Up. Father with two small sons dressed in Halloween costumes, walking into liquor store: Okay, guys, now pick out the kind of whiskey you want and go put it up on the counter. Oshkosh, Wisconsin |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 12:49 pm Post #15127 |
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Too Realistic, Huh? Teenage girl on bus: Oh, f#ck. What is this world coming to? It's like it gets worse and worse. Teenage guy sitting beside her: What? No. This wouldn't be the worst thing that's happened. Bad things happen all the time. Think about worse things going on right now, or that have been going on, for like, forever. Teenage girl: It feels like it's getting worse, though. Teenage guy: But it's not, though. Teenage girl: Yeah, but, these bad things keep happening. It always keeps happening. (pause) Teenage guy: I wanna go see Watchmen. Teenage girl: Don't, I heard it's not that good. Bus Ontario Canadia |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 12:51 pm Post #15128 |
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I Find the Current Lend-Lease Arrangement Quite Satisfactory Guy: I am making this shitty 50% less sodium Progresso chicken noodle soup. Tastes like penis! Girl: Always an appealing taste. Guy: If I ever get a twitter, that's my first status. Girl: I'm tempted to get one. (pause) A twitter, not a penis. University of Kansas |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 12:55 pm Post #15129 |
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Colleges Really Should Let Freshmen Drive Guy at comic book store: The last thing I want to see when watching Transformers is the car crying in the garage all alone because the kid is going away to college. Muskegon, Michigan |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 12:57 pm Post #15130 |
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Every Presentation Was Brought to Us by the Letter "O" Chick: I was in your area during lunch and thought about asking you to meet me for a quickie. Dude: What the f#ck? And you didn't, because...? Chick: I had to drive some coworkers back to the city. Wasn't sure what to do with them while we copulated. Dude: Do what my parents did, sit them down in front of the tv, turn on Sesame Street and turn it up! Conshohocken, Pennsylvania |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 12:59 pm Post #15131 |
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from overheardintheoffice.com 3PM Minimum Wage Buys You Minimum Service Loudspeaker: Customer assistance in fabrics. (pause) Says she's really, really angry, so...no rush. Wal-Mart Orlando, Florida |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 1:00 pm Post #15132 |
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2PM ...As a Way Of Earning Extra Credit. Undergraduate advisor: I'm coming around to the idea of casual sodomy. Austin, Texas Overheard by: count me in! |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 1:01 pm Post #15133 |
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1PM Well, It's Actually Only a Problem for the Baby Repair tech: My customer just called in and told me that his trans-vaginal probe is vibrating. Cube dweller: And that's a problem because...? Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 1:01 pm Post #15134 |
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12PM I'm Told It's Hypnotic to Watch Exec #1 to exec #2: Does it matter if there's more than one person? Exec #2: No, I'll just jiggle them around. Let me know who and I'll start jiggling. Washington, DC Overheard by: officedrone |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 1:03 pm Post #15135 |
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11AM Let's Just Say the Swings Go Both Ways Intern #1: I love that street, there's all those great restaurants there. Intern #2: I know! And there's that tranny park at the end of the block. Intern #1: What? Intern #2: I can't repeat what I just said. Manhattan, New York |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 1:03 pm Post #15136 |
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10AM An Office With No Gay People Is Like an Aquarium With No Fish Resident office gay guy: I cant wait until I am pregnant. Los Angeles, California |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 1:04 pm Post #15137 |
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9AM For the Last Time, That's Not What Winning a Peabody Award Means Senior editor to junior editor: Sure, he's a great writer. But he drinks his own pee. Halifax Nova Scotia Canadia |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 1:05 pm Post #15138 |
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5PM That, for Instance, Is Yesterday's Burrito Minion #1: Do you smell that? It smells like the wicker section of Zellers around here. Minion #2: Ah, you're right. It does smell like wicker. What is that? Who smells like wicker? Minion #1: I love playing the "what's that smell?" game in the hallway at work. Mississauga Ontario Canadia Overheard by: I Don't Stink |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 1:05 pm Post #15139 |
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4PM Hence the Old Expression "Hung Like a Texas Grandma" Peon, to neighbor: At least I know how to spell it. I may not know how to spell totes, but I know how to spell that word. Boss, interrupting: What do you know how to spell? Peon: Vasectomy. V-a-s-e-c-t-o-m-y. Boss: And in what context do you need to spell "vasectomy" in a work e-mail? Peon: I just wanted to let you guys know what is going on with this dude, he's going to be on the phone a lot today. Boss: Dude is getting a vasectomy? Peon, pointing back and forth to her left and right boob: No, his grandma is. Boss: Yeah, that's not a vasectomy. Humble, Texas |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 22, 2009 1:06 pm Post #15140 |
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3PM ...Minimum Nine-year-old girl in child psychology office, talking a mile a minute: And, mom, the teacher was really upset that we didn't know how long a century is! Yeah, she was really upset cause none of us knew! Mom: Do you know how long a century is? Nine-year-old girl: No! I didn't know either! I don't know how long a century is! Mom, incredulous: You don't know how long a century is? Nine-year-old girl: No! How long is it? Mom, without hesitation: Ten years. Marion, Indiana Overheard by: Which one of you is seeing the therapist again? |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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