 Wanted: New forum members! Do you have the right stuff to be an arch-angel member? Must be:
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| Tweet Topic Started: Thu Sep 27, 2007 7:29 am (69,416 Views) | |
| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:26 pm Post #12181 |
 
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Sassy flight attendant: In the event of a loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will be released from the overhead above your seat. After the screaming subsides, please place the oxygen mask around your nose and mouth. If you are traveling with a child or an adult who is acting like a child, place your mask on first before attempting to help put theirs on. --Flight out of LaGuardia Overheard by: Ronnie F |
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| Gummy | Sun May 10, 2009 4:26 pm Post #12182 |
Me in 10 years^^^
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:26 pm Post #12183 |
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Flight attendant: ...and for those of you who wish to smoke, quit! And if you want to smoke inside, you came to the wrong state. --Spirit Air flight into LaGuardia Overheard by: Kathryn |
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| Gummy | Sun May 10, 2009 4:26 pm Post #12184 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Sun May 10, 2009 4:27 pm Post #12185 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:27 pm Post #12186 |
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A Lot of People Call Her Apartment the Harlem of the Upper East Side Woman #1: Yeah, I tell ya, my baby's daddy has been the biggest jerk in the world lately. Woman #2: Will you stop calling him that! He's your husband. You married him like 5 years ago. --Au Bon Pain Overheard by: K |
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:27 pm Post #12187 |
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Doris Brings Manhattan to a Standstill Lost tourist on cell, blocking the crosswalk with her luggage: I'm standing on the corner of 42nd and 3rd. Passing native: Yeah, and in everyone's mothaf*cking way. --42nd & 3rd Overheard by: She was in my way too |
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:27 pm Post #12188 |
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Born-Again Brain Teaser God Squad lady: Praise Jesus! You won't be saved without Jesus! You have to start believing in Jesus to be saved! Jesus will always be there for you! Suit #1: Would it be so awful if we pushed her out when the doors open? Suit #2: No. Jesus will save her. --4 train Overheard by: Gregorio |
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:28 pm Post #12189 |
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And, Besides, I'm Chicken Man: I just don't get it! Just last night you were complaining about how you never try anything new, but you feel like you should. Woman: Ok, well ordering the roast duck is a little different than a threesome, Tim. --13th & 3rd Overheard by: Todd B |
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:29 pm Post #12190 |
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Hey, Man, Where Do You Think Families Come From? Young woman #1: Guys never want to eat me out. Middle-aged dad with kids: Hey, we're trying to eat over here. Young woman #1: See, even hearing about it freaks them out. Young man at next table: Maybe I can take a look for you and give you my assessment. Middle-aged dad with kids: For God's sake, this is a family restaurant! Young woman #2: You have a very controversial vagina. --Mickey D's, Times Square |
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:29 pm Post #12191 |
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And All the Proofreading in the World Can't Save Me Young man: I think you should have put LIFE and not LIVE on your sign. Jesus freak, holding sign reading THROUGH JESUS WILL YOU FIND ETERNAL LIVE: Oh, thank you. Have you accepted Jesus as your savior? Young man: No, I'm a dirty Jew. I'm going to hell. --42nd & 7th |
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| Gummy | Sun May 10, 2009 4:29 pm Post #12192 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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Rnt u glad that mah interwebz wuz down fer 3 dayz. 
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:29 pm Post #12193 |
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It's Even Funnier If You Know What They're Talking About Girl #1: You're a geek, too. You took your Lord of the Rings action figures to the opening night of Return of the King, and you made them sit on your lap and watch the movie. Girl #2: That wasn't me. Girl #1: Oh yeah. That was me. But you like Dune. Girl #2: Don't you have a crush on Muad'Dib? Girl #1: Oh yeah. --Penn Station |
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:30 pm Post #12194 |
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What all Those Sperm Banks Really do With it Drunk hipster #1: Yeah...snort c#m. Drunk hipster #2: How could I snort c#m? It's impossible! Drunk hipster #1: Nothing is impossible. Drunk hipster #2: But it's so sticky. I really don't think that's possible...unless maybe it was in powder form. Drunk hipster #1: Wow! We're those guys on the train everyone wants to shut up. --C train |
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:30 pm Post #12195 |
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I Can, I Just Can't Get Them to Pay Girl: That Susan's such a whore. Guy: Yeah, but wouldn't you be? Girl: What? Guy: You know, hypothetically, if you could get people to sleep with you. --11th & C |
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:31 pm Post #12196 |
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And I'm Gonna Tell Dick You Said That White boy #1: I only like to watch girl-on-girl. White boy #2: What? You don't like d!ck in your porn? That's f*cking gay. --Union Square Overheard by: Jesse |
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:31 pm Post #12197 |
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That One's Boring -- Tell the Donkey-Punch Story Again! Small child, trying a Sprite: I don't like it. Dad: If you don't like the taste, just spit it out. Mom: I've heard that one before. --33rd & 7th Overheard by: Brian Flanagan |
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:32 pm Post #12198 |
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Paradox: If All Men Are Liars, Did he Cheat or Not? Girl: Just tell me! Guy: Well what do you think? Do you think I cheated on you, yes or no? Girl: No! Guy: Wrong. --Williamsburg Overheard by: Emma |
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:32 pm Post #12199 |
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Because I'm Puerto Rican Queer #1: What did he just say? Queer #2: He called you maricon. It means fagg*t in Spanish. Queer #1: Oh, thank God. I thought he called me Mexican. I was about to be really offended. --Lorimer St, Williamsburg Overheard by: Ray |
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| AWOLangel | Sun May 10, 2009 4:33 pm Post #12200 |
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Not Without a Vagina It's Not Little boy: That's not art! Mom: Shhh... some people think so. Little boy: Nope, not art. --Whitney Museum, 5th floor Overheard by: didn't think it was art either |
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