 Wanted: New forum members! Do you have the right stuff to be an arch-angel member? Must be:
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| Tweet Topic Started: Thu Sep 27, 2007 7:29 am (69,531 Views) | |
| AWOLangel | Fri May 1, 2009 6:09 pm Post #9881 |
 
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Why Wearing Headphones Is So Popular in This Town Pretty young lady: Oh no, I hope that crazy guy doesn't try to hit on me. Crazy guy to girl: F*ck you, pig! I hope you die, bitch! Pretty lady's friend: I love this city. --East Village |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 1, 2009 6:14 pm Post #9882 |
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from notalwaysright.com This Is Why We Don’t Color Code People Ice Cream Parlor | California, USA Me: “Hi, what can I get for you?” Customer: “No!” Me: “I’m sorry?” Customer: “No! I don’t want no g**d*** Chinese serving me.” Me: “Excuse me?” Customer: “Are you retarded? Get me an American.” Me: “Sir, I am American.” Customer: “What?! You think I’m blind? You think I’m f***ing blind? Go back to China!” Me: “Right, one second…” (My coworkers hear everything from the back, so one of my white coworkers comes out.) Customer: “Ugh, finally… an American!” Coworker: *starts speaking Spanish* Customer: “G**D*** IT! F*** Y’ALL, A**HOLES!” *storms out* |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 1, 2009 6:16 pm Post #9883 |
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Disc Doctor, Not Disc Miracle Worker Retail | Erie, PA, USA (Our store sells a device called a Disc Doctor; it resurfaces CDs so they can be read again.) Caller: I bought a Disc Doctor and it isnt working. Manager: Well, I have one, and they can be difficult at times. Why dont you tell me what you did, and Ill try and talk you through it. Caller: Okay. I sprayed it with the solution and then I put both halves in the tray Manager: Wait did you just say both halves? Caller: Yeah, both halves. Manager: Yeah, thats not going to work |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 1, 2009 6:16 pm Post #9884 |
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From 20 Questions To Truth Or Dare Call Center | Rexburg, ID, USA (Note: I work at a call center doing surveys on tourism. This person was obviously drunk when I called them.) Me: Have you visited Texas within the last six months? Drunk guy: Yesh. Me: And how many people were in your travel party? Drunk guy: I have had enough of your questions. Its time for you to answer some of mine! Me: Sir, we only have a few more Drunk guy: Enough! What is your name, and have you ever been to a nudist colony?!" |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 1, 2009 6:16 pm Post #9885 |
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By Jove, I Think Hes Figured It Out Restaurant | Pittsburgh, PA, USA Me: Hey there, how can I help you? Customer: Yes, Id like to know the 9 types of lemonade you have. Me: Im sorry sir, we only have ONE kind of lemonade and were out of it. Customer: Okay, but what are your 9 different types? Me: Sir, I dont think you understand. We only have one kind of lemonade and were currently out of it. Customer: Okay. (The customer walks away, only to come back five minutes later.) Customer: If I ask you the same question from earlier, youre still going to give me the same answer, arent you? Me: Yes |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 1, 2009 6:17 pm Post #9886 |
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Too Bad It Doesnt Run On Stupidity Car Dealership | Vancouver, BC, Canada (This was before hybrid cars or electric cars were mainstream. A man called about his Lexus that just stopped working after a few days, so we had it towed back to the dealership.) Customer: I dont know what happened; the car just stopped while I was driving, and almost caused an accident because of you people! Me: OK, lets take a look. (I couldnt find any obvious issue, and all the free mechanics were giving the car a full once-over, trying to figure out the problem.) Customer: I spent tens of thousands on this car! How the he** can you sell anything that would crap out in 2 days?! (Just then I noticed the gas gauge was on Empty. I put a little gas in the engine and started it up.) Customer: What?! For that amount of money, with the technologies these days, you still need to use gas?! |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 1, 2009 6:22 pm Post #9887 |
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Hell Hath No Fury Like A Customer Scorned Tech Support | Oregon, USA Me: *on the phone* Thanks for calling **** Networks, how can I help you? Caller: I already called once today - I want you to stop sending me emails! Me: Youre getting emails from us? What do they say? Caller: Its a bunch of delivery failure messages. Ive gotten two thousand of them today, and I want you to fix it NOW! (I start explaining how spammers forge emails, causing these kinds of delivery failure messages, and I begin to offer a workaround.) Caller: NO! Stop bulls****ing me, just fix it NOW! Me: Im trying to tell you that its not a matter of fixing anyth Caller: HEY! Can I just say something? I know a lot of stuff, and I know you can fix this, so JUST DO IT! Me: Well, its Caller: JUST FIX IT! How long have you been Mr. Dumas? Me: Uh what? Caller: Mr. Dumas! How long have you been Mr. Dumas?! Me: Is that a pun? Caller: Yes, and youre a f***ing idiot! If you had half a brain, youd be smart! So are you going to fix it or not? Me: Sure. Caller: Well, seeing as how you never asked for my name, I think youre just trying to blow me off! Me: As I said, its not a matter of fixing anything Caller: Do you know who I am?! Me: No, you never told me your name. Caller: Thats right! And Im not going to! Im going to keep calling and wasting your time like youve wasted mine! I bet you could have handled 5 customers in the time weve been on the phone! Me: Yes, youre probably right. Caller: Well, Im just going to keep calling! Me: Who will that benefit? Caller: ME! Me: How? Caller: VENGEANCE! |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 1, 2009 6:23 pm Post #9888 |
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Camping By Any Other Name Hotel | Lexington Park, MD, USA Me: *on the phone* Thank you for calling the *** Lexington Park, this is ***, how can I help you? Caller: Yes, Id like to make a reservation for tonight, leaving tomorrow. Me: Im sorry maam, but were sold out for tonight. Caller: Sold out? You mean you dont have anything? Me: No, I apologize. We are completely sold out. Caller: You cant be! I need a room. I mean, Ill take anything! Do you have any suites left? Me: No, maam. No more rooms left. Thats what sold out means. Everyone has checked into their rooms already. Caller: I dont believe you! Hotels always have some kind of room set aside for people when theyre sold out. Me: Well I could fix a roll away bed up on the roof for you if you like. Its gonna rain a little later, so I hope you dont mind getting wet. Caller: Really? That would be great! Thank you so much! How much does it cost? Me: Have a good day, maam |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 1, 2009 6:28 pm Post #9889 |
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Back To Basics Is Best Hardware Store | San Antonio, TX, USA Customer: I need something to make a nail go into a piece of woodyou know, to make it stay where Im putting it. Me: a hammer, sir? Customer: Oh, is that what you would recommend? Me: Uhyeah. Customer: Great, show me where they are! 1 Thumbs Up |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 1, 2009 6:29 pm Post #9890 |
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Either Way, Someones Wearing Diapers Movie Theater | Savannah, GA, USA (Im selling movie theater tickets to a couple thats obviously in their 30s or 40s.) Me: So for two adults, the total is $19. Male customer: Cant we get a discount? Shes a senior! How old do you have to be to be a senior? Me: She has to be 60 to be a senior. Male customer: Shes 59 and a half! Can we get a discount? (Its a slow day, so I oblige.) Me: Well alright, how about $16.50? Male customer: Awesome, youre the best! So you gave her the senior ticket, right? Me: No, sir, I gave you a child. Female customer: *laughs* Thank you, youve definitely got him figured out! |
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| AWOLangel | Fri May 1, 2009 6:30 pm Post #9891 |
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Its Called Healthyitis Doctor | Maine, USA Me: Thank you for waiting, my name is Megan. What is your call regarding? Patient: Yeah, I want to ask the nurse a question. Me: Is this regarding symptoms you are experiencing? Patient: Yeah well, kind of. Me: What symptoms are you experiencing? Patient: Actually, none. Me: you are experiencing no symptoms? Patient: Yeah I have no pain and I just want to know if that is normal. |
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| Gummy | Fri May 1, 2009 7:16 pm Post #9892 |
Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Fri May 1, 2009 7:17 pm Post #9893 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Fri May 1, 2009 7:17 pm Post #9894 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Fri May 1, 2009 7:17 pm Post #9895 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Fri May 1, 2009 7:18 pm Post #9896 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Fri May 1, 2009 7:18 pm Post #9897 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Fri May 1, 2009 7:18 pm Post #9898 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Fri May 1, 2009 7:19 pm Post #9899 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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| Gummy | Fri May 1, 2009 7:19 pm Post #9900 |
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Me in 10 years^^^
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