 Wanted: New forum members! Do you have the right stuff to be an arch-angel member? Must be:
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| Tweet Topic Started: Thu Sep 27, 2007 7:29 am (69,568 Views) | |
| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:17 pm Post #9141 |
 
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This Girl Is My New Best Friend Drunk girl in painful-looking heels to tour group of incoming freshmen: This is your future! Michigan State University |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:18 pm Post #9142 |
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from overheardatthebeach.com Did You Go to High School in North Carolina? Dumb blonde: It's not "labia Menorah"? Friend: No, that's the Jewish thing. Dumb blonde: So what is it then? --Siesta Key, Florida |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:19 pm Post #9143 |
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What Happens When You Take Sex Ed in North Carolina Girl #1: Oh, man! So, for Christmas my dad is letting me get my cartilidge pierced! I'm so excited! Girl #2: Oh, man, that's so cool! I want to get mine done, too. Girl #1: Yeah, I'll only ever get my ears pierced. Everything else is so gross and weird. Girl #3: Yeah, well, I have my clit pierced -- do you think that's weird? Girl #2: What's a clit? --Nags Head, North Carolina |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:19 pm Post #9144 |
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Now Go Make Friends Mother: Do you know how dogs introduce themselves to each other? Eight-year-old daughter: No, how? Mother: They sniff each other's butts. --Guam Overheard by: Nadine |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:20 pm Post #9145 |
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A Lesson Every Proper Young Lady Must Eventually Learn Girl #1: You need to learn to give off a "piss off" vibe. Follow my lead. Girl #2 (to drunk groping her): If you f*cking touch me one more time I'll cut off your balls! Girl #1: Or just do that... --Bondi Beach, Australia |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:21 pm Post #9146 |
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from overheardattheoffice.com 3PM WouldYou Be Satisfied with a Muffin Basket? Tech rep to customer: I'm sorry, sir, we don't have any little balls to send out. Allentown, Pennsylvania |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:21 pm Post #9147 |
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2PM Since I Dedicated My Life to Change Assistant copy editor, checking metro fares: A dollar thirty-five and fifteen minutes. Senior copy editor, passing by: I'm going to have that written on my tombstone! Dupont Circle Washington, DC |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:22 pm Post #9148 |
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1PM Tragically, Hitting the Bottle. Lady in office: That's odd...I just got a voice mail from a baby! Man: When did that happen? Lady in office: 11 pm last night...what was a baby even doing up at that hour? Washington, DC Overheard by: MIke |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:22 pm Post #9149 |
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11AM In Case You Wondered Why I Just Soiled My Ergonomic Chair Cube clown: My mother used to do weird stuff when I was growing up. Like, I still sleep with my foot outside the covers, and she used to crawl in on her hands and knees and grab my foot. Dallas, Texas |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:23 pm Post #9150 |
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9AM So I Put Little Birkenstocks on Them in the Hope Of Sparking Some Passion Office girl on phone: I finally found out why my hamsters aren't f*cking! I have three girls! Denham Springs, Louisiana Overheard by: Erin |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:23 pm Post #9151 |
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5PM Tell Her the Beds Of Nails Are Non-Negotiable Insurance agent on phone: I don't care if she's a bleeder! Cincinnati, Ohio Overheard by: maybe I do! |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:26 pm Post #9152 |
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4PM Um, WebMD Doesn't Offer That Service, Sir Cube guy on phone: Should I e-mail you when I have another dump? Fairfax, Virginia |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:26 pm Post #9153 |
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3PM That Explains What Happened to the Chair Cushions in the Conference Room Coworker #1, after big move: Hey, we've got another box empty. Coworker #2: Great, we can use it for these mystery files until they've got somewhere to go. Coworker #1: Really? Um, I was going to start building a fort with it. Sheffield England |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:27 pm Post #9154 |
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2PM I'd Like My Sexual Harassment Suit to Be Accurate Boss, offhandedly: I love this company. I want to have sexual relations with this company. Confused employee: You mean...in the company building? Or...with the company? Southern California |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:27 pm Post #9155 |
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12PM His Role Model Is Puck from The Real World: San Francisco Super-hyper guy: If anyone ever saw what I did to my peanut butter, then they definitely wouldn't want it! Austin, Texas |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:39 pm Post #9156 |
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11AM I Was Already Nauseated at "Comcast" Woman employee, opening her Comcast bill: Shit! I forgot to cancel the porn channel again! Male coworker, disgusted: Ugh! Too much information! Charleston, South Carolina Overheard by: Aaron |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:40 pm Post #9157 |
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10AM Call Me the Next Time You Can Wiggle Your Hands Free-- Love Ya! Employee on phone: I don't know if Sue* knows about the twin sister. I know Lucy* does--the maid--because they were kidnapped together. (pause) Oh. Okay, I'll talk to you later. Bye! Saratoga Springs, New York Overheard by: Intrigued my comment: sounds like a soap opera |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:40 pm Post #9158 |
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9AM Despite What You Read in the Gay and Lesbian Section Butch chick: I read The Lion and the Mouse when I was young! It's a story about how the lion got a thorn in his paw and the mouse helped him remove it, and they became friends. Normal chick: What a stupid lion, why didn't he just eat the mouse? Butch chick: It's a story of morality for children! Help someone, be friendly! Normal chick: So? Butch chick: You don't eat your friends! Borders Melbourne Central Australia Overheard by: Incognito |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:45 pm Post #9159 |
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from overheardinnewyork.com American or Australian? Breakfast cart guy: Do you have change for a $5? Customer: No, sorry. Breakfast cart guy, to hobo under blanket: Do you have singles for a $5? Hobo: Me? Why are you asking me... (stops to think) Wait...as a matter of fact, I do! --3rd Ave & 9th St Overheard by: Hunter |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Apr 28, 2009 12:45 pm Post #9160 |
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Possibly a Rudeceratops Little kid, after passenger belches: Mommy, is that man a new dinosaur species? He sounds like it. Mom: No, he's just rude. (subway doors open and the passenger departs) Little kid, yelling from the door: New species! New species! --R Line |
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