 Wanted: New forum members! Do you have the right stuff to be an arch-angel member? Must be:
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| Tweet Topic Started: Thu Sep 27, 2007 7:29 am (69,625 Views) | |
| AWOLangel | Sun Mar 8, 2009 8:44 pm Post #8001 |
 
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People never cough, sneeze, blow their noses, or show any other symptoms of being in less than perfect health. |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Mar 8, 2009 8:44 pm Post #8002 |
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Only exception to the above is when they're dying. A cough is a symptom of terminal illness. |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Mar 8, 2009 8:44 pm Post #8003 |
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Menstruation is an unknown phenomenon in movies. Female movie characters are all immune from it. |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Mar 8, 2009 8:44 pm Post #8004 |
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You can eat as much as you want in a film and you'll never EVER have to go to the bathroom. |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Mar 8, 2009 8:45 pm Post #8005 |
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Vomit is portrayed by distant toilet flush. Nobody ever throws-up on the carpet. |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Mar 8, 2009 8:48 pm Post #8006 |
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more from overheardeverywhere Depends Who You Ask Trixy McBimbo: Is "artillery" another word for money? Loyola University Chicago, Illinois |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Mar 8, 2009 8:48 pm Post #8007 |
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Worst. Smoothie. Ever. Guy #1: Did you see the video where that girl shoots a banana out of her ass? Guy #2: Yeah! And then she's like "I think there's still a strawberry up there!" Clemson University Clemson, South Carolina Overheard by: starch |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Mar 8, 2009 8:49 pm Post #8008 |
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Thanks, Sharper Image! Loud girl: And my mother said to me, "Well, I guess you're an adult now, since you have adult sex." And I was like, "What the f*ck is that supposed to mean?" and she was like, "I opened your cupboard." and I was thinking, "Oh shit!" because I've got a lot of shit in there. I've got porn, I've got a vibrator, a cock ring. I've got things she doesn't even know what to call them! University of Pennsylvania Overheard by: Alex Remnick |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Mar 8, 2009 8:50 pm Post #8009 |
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Who Says Kids Today Have No Goals? Student #1: So you're only taking three credit hours this semester? Student #2: Yeah. I figure as long as I take at least one class, I can live at home and mooch off of my mother indefinitely. Student #1: You dreamed it, saw it and are going for it. Awesome, dude. UCF Orlando, Florida |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Mar 8, 2009 8:50 pm Post #8010 |
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Still, Nobody Better Lay a Finger on My Buttfingerer Teenage girl to friend: And then he stuck his finger up my butt, and said "Oh, yeah, do you like that, babe?" Friend: See, there you go. If you don't sit a guy down and tell him not to go up your butt, he will. Look at you, you're butt-fingered. Subway Store Maitland Australia |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Mar 8, 2009 8:50 pm Post #8011 |
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But I'm Currently Putting David Hasselhoff Through a Rigorous Mentorship Program Elderly Italian lady to store clerk, while judging jugs of wine: I'm the last of the great drinkers. Liquor Store Philadelphia, Pennsylvania Overheard by: Steve |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Mar 8, 2009 8:51 pm Post #8012 |
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I Mean, Do You or Do You Not Work for Domino's? Girl on cell: You mean you need at least thirty minutes? It's only supposed to last ten minutes, that's why it's called a quickie! UC Irvine Irvine, California |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Mar 8, 2009 8:54 pm Post #8013 |
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Except in Situations Involving Family Members, Minors, or Brett Michaels Curly-haired woman on cell: My advice is to have sex in 90% of all situations. San Francisco, California Overheard by: Poogtastic |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Mar 8, 2009 8:55 pm Post #8014 |
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Gives the TAs a Nice Change from the Shit They Have to Deal with Girl in math class: I mean, seriously. I've been pissing all over these quizzes lately. Friend: I know, right? Me too. Michigan State University |
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| wissaboo | Sun Mar 8, 2009 9:50 pm Post #8015 |
 
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wow. that was a lot of spam today |
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| Heather | Sun Mar 8, 2009 10:00 pm Post #8016 |
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Where?? 
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| Gummy | Mon Mar 9, 2009 3:24 am Post #8017 |
Me in 10 years^^^
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I have no idea what you mean. 
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| AWOLangel | Mon Mar 9, 2009 2:11 pm Post #8018 |
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contuning with overheardeverywhere Brunette: I don't think dinosaurs were ever real. Blonde: Why is that? Brunette: If they were really that big, only like ten could fit on earth. They wouldn't even be able to walk around much. Blonde: Oh, you're probably right. I've never thought about it like that before. Northern Michigan University |
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| AWOLangel | Mon Mar 9, 2009 2:12 pm Post #8019 |
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Given the Way I Kept Shouting "Whore!" at Her Girl on cell: Yeah, he was there, and he brought the girl he cheated on me with. (long pause) It made the family dinner a little awkward. Michigan State University |
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| AWOLangel | Mon Mar 9, 2009 2:12 pm Post #8020 |
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Your Editors Are Standing by Literature professor: You know, eventually we're going to have to talk about the clitoris. (class stares at him in silence) Maybe not today, but one of these days. I'm just saying. Milwaukee, Wisconsin Overheard by: trying not to laugh |
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