 Wanted: New forum members! Do you have the right stuff to be an arch-angel member? Must be:
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| Tweet Topic Started: Thu Sep 27, 2007 7:29 am (68,942 Views) | |
| AWOLangel | Fri Oct 15, 2010 9:24 pm Post #21661 |
 
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Happy Hour, Right Day, Wrong Year Bar | Minnesota, USA Customer: “Is it true that you give out free drinks on people’s birthdays?” Me: “It’s true we’ll give you one free drink, yes, but I need to see your ID to confirm it’s your birthday.” Customer: *hands over ID* Me: “Yeah, it’s your birthday. Pity you can’t legally drink ’til your next one.” |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri Oct 15, 2010 9:25 pm Post #21662 |
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One Tag To Name Them All, And In The Darkness Find Them Restaurant | Greenfield, MA, USA (I work at a fast food restaurant and after work, I go to the grocery store still in uniform to pick up dinner.) Customer: “Hello, can you tell me where the [item] is?” Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, but I don’t work here. I work across the street at [restaurant].” *I point to my hat with the company logo* Customer: “Why are you pointing at your hat? I don’t understand. Are you going to take me to the [item] or not?” Me: “I’m really very sorry, but I don’t work here. I can’t help you.” Customer: “But you have a name tag!” |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri Oct 15, 2010 9:25 pm Post #21663 |
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Getting Landlines Tangled Call Center | Ireland (I call the customer.) Customer: “Hello?” Me: “Hello, this is AWOLangel , may I please speak to [customer]?” Customer: “Yes, speaking.” Me: “I am calling from [company name]. There is a slight issue with your account. Do you have a moment to discuss this issue now?” *long pause* Customer: “Hello? Hello?! Sorry, I have terrible reception here.” Me: “Sir, I am speaking to you on your home phone.” Customer: “What?!” *hangs up* |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Fri Oct 15, 2010 9:26 pm Post #21664 |
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Bride Denied Retail | Iowa City, IA, USA (Two women walk in.) Me: “Hi how can I help you?” Customer: “We’d like to return this dinnerware set. It comes from a registry so here that is also.” Me: “Okay. Is there anything wrong with it?” Customer: “No, we just decided we didn’t like the bride that much.” |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| Ltpondwater9 | Sat Oct 16, 2010 3:53 pm Post #21665 |
**Tomahawk Chop**
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 Rally cap time!!! Again!!!
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| AWOLangel | Sun Oct 17, 2010 4:23 pm Post #21666 |
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from not always right The Pen Is Mightier Than The Brain Call Center | Los Angeles, CA, USA Me: “I’m about to give you your account number. Do you have a pen handy?” Caller: “What’s a pen-handy?” |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Oct 17, 2010 4:23 pm Post #21667 |
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Popcon Movie Theater | Calgary, AB, Canada (A customer walks up holding a large red bag of popcorn to be refilled.) Customer: “Hi, could I please get a refill?” Me: “Did you buy this popcorn today?” Customer: “Yes.” Me: “Oh, that’s weird because we stopped selling these popcorn bags a month ago. We have black bags now.” Customer: “Oh…” |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Oct 17, 2010 4:24 pm Post #21668 |
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Very Low Key Driver Call Center | Norway, Europe Caller: “Hi, I need help to open my car. The beeper doesn’t work.” Me: “Okay, have you tried to see if the keys work?” Caller: “What do you mean?” Me: “The car keys. They’re attached to the beeper.” Caller: “Uh… how do I use them?” Me: “Just like you would unlock anything that’s closed.” Caller: “I don’t understand. I need to open the door to my car. How do I use keys to do that?” Me: “You uh… put the key in the keyhole, turn it around and open the door.” Caller: *pause* “Oh! Do you mean like the same way you open the door to a house?” Me: “Yes, it’s quite similar to that.” Caller: *very enthusiastic* “Wow, okay! I’ll try that! If that doesn’t work, I’ll call right back!” |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Oct 17, 2010 4:24 pm Post #21669 |
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This Child Has Few Reservations Camp | Asheville, NC, USA Child: “Excuse me, but I have a question.” Me: “What is it?” Child: “Do you believe in Native Americans?” Me: *slight pause* “Yes. Yes, I do.” Child: “That’s good to know.” |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Oct 17, 2010 4:27 pm Post #21670 |
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A Few Knights Short Of A Round Table Medieval Fair | Germany (I am a dressmaker who specializes in historical clothing. I have made several dresses to illustrate the evolution of fashion over the centuries. These dresses hang in the back of our stall, each labeled with the proper century.) Customer: *rushes up an points to the 15th-century dress* “Oh, that’s my dress there!” Me: “Yes, it’s beautiful, isn’t it? Would you like to try it?” Customer: “I’d like to buy it. It’s exactly my dress.” Me: “Your dress?” Customer: “Yes. I had past-life regression last week. And I wore this dress while I was waltzing with King Arthur 500 years ago!” |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Oct 17, 2010 4:27 pm Post #21671 |
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Stupidity In Bloom Restaurant | Long Beach, CA, USA (We have run out of sandwiches that had meat and are only left with garden/veggie burgers.) Customer: “What’s that?” Me: “It’s a veggie burger, so there’s no meat in it. We call it a garden burger here.” Customer: “Garden burger? So there are flowers in there?” |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Oct 17, 2010 4:29 pm Post #21672 |
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Half Past Wine Fast Food | Scottsdale, AZ, USA (It was past closing time, all the lights were off and the gate was half closed. I came out of the back to find a woman standing in the store.) Me: “I’m sorry ma’am, we’re closed.” Customer: *slurred* “But I need to buy some peanut butter.” Me: “I’m sorry, you’ll have to come back tomorrow morning, we open at 10.” Customer: “I thought you were open till 9? You shouldn’t be closing early. That’s bad business.” Me: “It’s past 9, ma’am.” Customer: “But the bartender downstairs said it was another half hour until all the stores closed.” Me: “How long ago was that?” Customer: “It couldn’t have been too long. I only had a couple of drinks after he told me.” |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Oct 17, 2010 4:29 pm Post #21673 |
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Make A Bullet Point About Bertha Call Center | Peoria, IL, USA Me: “Sir, do we need to speak with anyone other than yourself to gain access onto your property?” Customer: “No, no. My wife will be home. Oh yeah, and Bertha.” Me: “Bertha, sir?” Customer: “Bertha’s my shotgun, in case any of your technicians decide to get kinky with my wife.” |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Oct 17, 2010 4:29 pm Post #21674 |
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Excess Of XY Assisted Living Home | Hilton, NY, USA Me: “Hi, My name is Randi, I’ll be taking your order tonight.” Old man: “Randi? That’s a boy’s name.” Me: “No, it’s spelled with a ‘Y’. Mine is spelled with an ‘I’. I’m a girl.” Old woman: “Leave her alone, maybe she’s both! They have those nowadays.” |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Oct 17, 2010 4:30 pm Post #21675 |
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These Are Not The Coins You Are Looking For Grocery Store | Salem, OR, USA (I have just finished ringing up a small order for a man and his 20-year-old son. Their change is only three cents, and they have already started walking away before I could hand it to them.) Me: “Wait, I’ve still got your change, unless you don’t want it.” Customer’s son: *doing Jedi hand wave* “We want our change.” Me: *at the same time* “You don’t want your change.” (We both wait a beat, then everyone in line breaks out laughing. We hadn’t practiced it, either.) |
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| AWOLangel | Sun Oct 17, 2010 4:31 pm Post #21676 |
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No Aptitude For Latitude, Part 2 Gift Shop | Anchorage, AK, USA (I am talking to a woman on the phone who needs to call back the next day. She is in Texas). Caller: “What time is it there?” Me: “Three thirty.” Caller: “In the morning?” Me: “No, in the afternoon.” Caller: “Oh. Of what day?” Me: “Saturday. We’re only three hours different from you.” Caller: “Really?” *pause* “Is it snowing?” Me: “No ma’am, its August. Its nice and sunny out.” Caller: “Oh wow!” |
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| spocklet | Sun Oct 17, 2010 5:04 pm Post #21677 |
Live long and prosper.....!!
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 I know these people sooo well !! 
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| R.I.P. Gummy, we'll miss you bro | |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Oct 19, 2010 8:20 pm Post #21678 |
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Chinchilla, I Choose You Pet Store | San Diego, CA, USA Customer: “Hi, I’m looking for a pet for my daughter. I think she’d like one of those furry things. You know, a pikachu?” Me: *pause* “A pikachu?” Customer: “Yeah, you know. It looks like a hamster and a rabbit put together.” Me: “Do you mean a chinchilla?” Customer: “Yeah! That’s it!” |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Oct 19, 2010 8:20 pm Post #21679 |
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Magic Marker Deli | Victoria, BC, Canada Customer: “Excuse me, I want a piece of this cheese but the only one you have expires tomorrow.” Me: “Sorry, it looks like we’re sold out of that kind. Our truck comes in tomorrow though.” Customer: *holding out the piece of cheese* “Well just put more days on it then!” Me: “Pardon?” Customer: “Just put more days on this piece!” Me: “You want me to print a new label with a different expiration date?” Customer: “Yeah!” Me: “Ma’am, no matter what the label says, the cheese is going to expire tomorrow.” Customer: “That’s just stupid!” |
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| AWOLangel | Tue Oct 19, 2010 8:21 pm Post #21680 |
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Try Telling That To The Banks Retail | Garland, TX, USA (I am working the returns counter when a couple walks in with a set of weights.) Me: “How can we help you today?” Customer: “Yeah, we need to return this. It’s the wrong color.” Me: “Okay, do you have your receipt?” Customer: “Yes. But we’re going to do an exchange for something cheaper. Is it alright if we get what’s left over on a gift card?” Me: “Sure.” (The couple go shopping and come back. We go through the transaction.) Me: “Alright, so $60.00 will be credited back. Do you have the credit card you used?” Customer: “But we wanted the extra on a gift card.” Me: “Yes, but since theft is a common problem, it’s store policy to check your ID first. I just need to verify that you have the original card.” Customer: “But we want the extra on a gift card. Do you understand? What’s left over, on a gift card!” Me: “Yes, I understand, but I need to see the original card first.” Customer: “But I don’t have it. I don’t own that card!” Me: “Then I’m afraid we can’t do this transaction.” Customer: “No, you don’t understand. I want what’s left over on a gift card, so that my wife can use it!” Me: “Yes, but sir, it’s illegal for us to take somebody else’s money without their permission.” Customer: “God D*****! Since when do you need permission to get somebody else’s money?” |
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