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| Cheap Laugh time | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Sat Aug 26, 2006 6:20 pm (1,792 Views) | |
| SeerSGB | Sat Aug 26, 2006 6:20 pm Post #1 |
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Ziggy Says you got to work the shaft..work the shaft!
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• From an Atlanta police report, summarized in a July issue of the weekly Creative Loafing: A man working on a house on Smith Street was taken to Grady Memorial Hospital with serious injuries to his posterior. He happened to be bending over next to a wall that, unknown to him, a worker on the other side was drilling into, and the drill bit entered his “anal cavity.” • Least Competent Cops: Four New York City police were called to an apartment house in July in the Bronx concerning a landlord-tenant dispute, but were distracted by a teenager in the hallway smoking marijuana and started to chase him, when a pit bull attacked the officers. The toll, 26 bullets later: one dead dog, one bitten officer, three other officers wounded by each other’s gunshots. Link |
| " you never reach glory or self-fulfillment unless you're willing to risk everything, dare anything, put yourself dead on the line every time; and that once one becomes strong or rich or potent or powerful it is the responsibility of the strong to help the weak become strong." - Harlan Ellison | |
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| wissaboo | Sat Aug 26, 2006 6:41 pm Post #2 |
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I wonder what happened in the landlord/tennant dispute?
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| AWOLangel | Sat Aug 26, 2006 6:47 pm Post #3 |
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sounds like something in the police academy movies |
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| Jadzia20 | Mon Aug 28, 2006 4:46 am Post #4 |
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When I crack that whip, everybody goin' to trip like circus
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| FlyingPope | Mon Aug 28, 2006 11:58 am Post #5 |
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Entrepeneur-in-Training
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| Bluetoille | Mon Aug 28, 2006 12:43 pm Post #6 |
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| Purplelizard2006 | Mon Aug 28, 2006 7:39 pm Post #7 |
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It's Christmas!
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:liz::liz: |
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| Vilya | Mon Aug 28, 2006 8:49 pm Post #8 |
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1000 post angel
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Ok, the first one wasn't funny. But the second one
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![]() [MOOD]relaxed[/MOOD]
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| SeerSGB | Thu Aug 31, 2006 3:48 pm Post #9 |
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Ziggy Says you got to work the shaft..work the shaft!
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And this one get the award for marketting stunt of the year:
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| " you never reach glory or self-fulfillment unless you're willing to risk everything, dare anything, put yourself dead on the line every time; and that once one becomes strong or rich or potent or powerful it is the responsibility of the strong to help the weak become strong." - Harlan Ellison | |
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| AWOLangel | Thu Aug 31, 2006 7:01 pm Post #10 |
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just when you thought you've seen everything
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All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.--Abraham Lincoln | |
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| wissaboo | Thu Aug 31, 2006 9:16 pm Post #11 |
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That makes absolutely no sense at all.
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| wissaboo | Thu Aug 31, 2006 9:19 pm Post #12 |
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Most of you have probably seen this at st.com, but not all of us go there and it just had me howling
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| Rachel | Fri Sep 1, 2006 7:05 am Post #13 |
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TOS Girl: All the Way!
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Instead of starting a new thread... Got this in an email ![]() ![]() Rachel
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Rachel![]() ![]() | |
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| Rachel | Wed Sep 6, 2006 5:07 am Post #14 |
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TOS Girl: All the Way!
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Here's another email funny ![]() READ CAREFULLY! I don't how many of you shop at Sam's Club or Costco, but this may be useful to know. I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping. This happened to me and it could happen to you!! Here's how the scam works: Two seriously good-looking 23-year-old well-built guys come over to your car as you are packing your shopping in the trunk. They both are shirtless and start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their highly-defined chest muscles and rock-hard abs exposed. It's impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say 'No' and instead ask you for a ride to another Sam's Club or Costco. You agree and they get in the back seat. On the way, they start talking dirty about what they want to do to you. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and begins kissing your neck and begs you to pull over so he can make love to you!! While this is going on the other guy steals your purse!! I had my purse stolen last Tuesday, Wednesday, twice on Thursday, again on Saturday, and also yesterday and most likely tomorrow. Anyone need anything at Costco, I'm going later today and probably tomorrow. Rachel ![]() |
Rachel![]() ![]() | |
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| wissaboo | Wed Sep 6, 2006 9:04 am Post #15 |
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That seems like a small price to pay.
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| Rachel | Wed Sep 6, 2006 9:07 am Post #16 |
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TOS Girl: All the Way!
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Rachel![]() ![]() | |
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| FlyingPope | Wed Sep 6, 2006 10:31 am Post #17 |
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Entrepeneur-in-Training
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| Rachel | Mon Sep 11, 2006 9:41 am Post #18 |
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TOS Girl: All the Way!
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Yet another email funny: SURROGATE FATHER The Smiths were unable to conceive children, and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. The day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should be here soon." Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. "Good morning madam. I've come to......" "Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Smith cut in. "Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good! I've made a specialty of babies." "That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat." After a moment she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?" "Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room floor is fun too....you can really spread out!" "Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for Harry and me!" "Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results." "My, my, that's a lot of ....of.....!!" gasped Mrs. Smith. "Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but you'd be disappointed with that, I'm sure." "Don't I know it," Mrs. Smith muttered. The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. "This was done on the top of a bus." "Oh my god!!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, tugging at her handkerchief. "And these twins turned out exceptionally well, when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with." "She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith faintly. "Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep, pushing to get a good look." "Four and five deep?" asked Mrs. Smith, eyes widened in amazement. "Yes", the photographer said. "And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling; I could hardly concentrate! Then darkness approached and I began to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just packed it all in." Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "You mean they actually chewed on your ... um ... equipment?" "That's right. Well, madam, if you're ready, I'll set up my tripod so that we can get to work" "Tripod???!!" "Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big for me to hold for very long.......Madam? Madam?...Good Lord, she's fainted....!" Rachel
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Rachel![]() ![]() | |
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| nhranger | Mon Sep 11, 2006 9:48 am Post #19 |
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1000 post angel
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:swoon: |
| You know, there are some words I've known since I was a schoolboy: "With the first link, the chain is forged. The first speech censured, the first thought forbidden, the first freedom denied, chains us all irrevocably." Those words were uttered by Judge Aaron Satie, as wisdom and warning. The first time any man's freedom is trodden on, we're all damaged. | |
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| Purplelizard2006 | Mon Sep 11, 2006 9:54 am Post #20 |
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It's Christmas!
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She just plopped down.... Poor lady.
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![]() ![]() ![]() I'm the biker babe! | |
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I wonder what happened in the landlord/tennant dispute? 





I'm the biker babe!
[MOOD]relaxed[/MOOD]







11:47 AM Jul 11
