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| I Do Poetry; This 1 got published in a book | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jun 19 2007, 11:28 PM (312 Views) | |
| Zabuza4 | Jun 19 2007, 11:28 PM Post #1 |
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There's No Wii In PS3
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HEY I saw you again to day It was the just like any other day Since the day we met I couldn稚 get you out of my mind I just know 1 day you値l be mine I値l be yours & we値l be ours All the hours That I知 not with you it hurts Ever since i saw you in that mini skirt I hope some day Some way You値l sway My way And i'll say Hey Jus like any other day |
98% of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you are one of the 2% who hasn't, copy & paste this into your signature/journal.![]()
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| Deleted User | Jun 20 2007, 12:10 AM Post #2 |
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Deleted User
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I know it's free verse but it seems to be lacking a lot of structure and depth.. |
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| Zabuza4 | Jun 20 2007, 01:14 AM Post #3 |
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There's No Wii In PS3
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You write poetry 2???? well it got published |
98% of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you are one of the 2% who hasn't, copy & paste this into your signature/journal.![]()
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| Deleted User | Jun 20 2007, 07:14 AM Post #4 |
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Deleted User
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I like it, just the word mini skirt seems weird to me like its not something relevant to the poem. |
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| Kakashi Elite | Jun 20 2007, 09:29 AM Post #5 |
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NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER MY NIGGER NIGGER
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LOL, I agree with Davis there. How did that get published?! Anyways, it's pretty good but not all that great if you catch my drift
~KE |
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I HAVE HERPES FROM MY MOTHER PLEASE MAKE SEX WITH ME | |
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| Zabuza4 | Jun 20 2007, 09:53 AM Post #6 |
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There's No Wii In PS3
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Yea & about the mini skirt i not a serious person & this poem was getting too serious & i couldn't find anything else that rhymed with hurts |
98% of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you are one of the 2% who hasn't, copy & paste this into your signature/journal.![]()
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| Kakashi Elite | Jun 20 2007, 10:02 AM Post #7 |
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NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER MY NIGGER NIGGER
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You couldn't? If you want to be a poet, then I suggest you expand your vocabulary? I rap, so I know what it is trying to rhyme something, it's not that hard. But I still can't believe you got this published?! Who published it, and why did they? ~KE |
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I HAVE HERPES FROM MY MOTHER PLEASE MAKE SEX WITH ME | |
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| Zabuza4 | Jun 20 2007, 10:45 AM Post #8 |
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There's No Wii In PS3
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that goes with the poem????, Poetry.com, "Great poetic talents" |
98% of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you are one of the 2% who hasn't, copy & paste this into your signature/journal.![]()
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| Kakashi Elite | Jun 20 2007, 11:16 AM Post #9 |
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NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER MY NIGGER NIGGER
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What goes with the poem? Explain things in your posts
~KE |
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I HAVE HERPES FROM MY MOTHER PLEASE MAKE SEX WITH ME | |
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| Arashi | Jul 25 2007, 03:33 PM Post #10 |
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Genin
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You got it published at poetry.com? Lmao, I know that place, basically ANY poem you submit get "publishes" and it's an "amazing" poem to them, submitted 2 just for fun because I love to write and they both could have been published but I wasn't going to pay the moeny for some crap site like that, sadly... (my opion on the site, sorry if it offends anyone) As for what i think about your poem....there are some grammer mistakes that annoy me and mess up the flow, the little mini skirt thing was a bit odd but did fit in with the whole rhyme. I really loved it as it got further in, it was cute and flowed really well. |
I love Axel and Demyx <3
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1:46 AM Jul 11